The Good Mother Myth by Avital Norman Nathman – Review

Nonfic

The Good Mother Myth

By Avital Norman Nathman

Expected Publication: December 2013

Length: 224 pages

Publisher: Seal Press

Source: Supplied by publisher and Netgalley for Honest Review

Genre: Non Fiction

 


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Synopsis from Goodreads

In an era of mommy blogs, Pinterest, and Facebook, The Good Mother Myth dismantles the social media-fed notion of what it means to be a good mother. This collection of essays takes a realistic look at motherhood and provides a platform for real voices and raw stories, each adding to the narrative of motherhood we don’t tend to see in the headlines or on the news.

From tales of mind-bending, panic-inducing overwhelm to a reflection on using weed instead of wine to deal with the terrible twos, the honesty of the essays creates a community of mothers who refuse to feel like they’re in competition with others, or with the notion of the ideal mom — they’re just trying to find a way to make it work.

With a foreword by Christy Turlington Burns and a contributor list that includes Jessica Valenti, Sharon Lerner, Lisa Duggan, and many more, this remarkable collection seeks to debunk the myth and offer some honesty about what it means to be a mother.

 
my thoughts

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This novel is a must for any expectant Mothers!

This book really hit hard for me, as a young mother of Two autistic children, you are constantly told how to raise them, what you need to do everyday so you don’t screw them up. My son as a newborn would not breast feed the guilt and anguish that I felt as a new mother was horrible, the nurses wouldn’t let me give up and it wasn’t happening, after a week in hospital and a stint in Neonatal ward I told them I was leaving and I was bottle feeding him my breast milk, you would think that I offered to chop off his head. I cried for weeks over it.

Any mother will find parenting hard, with today’s pressures on being the perfect mother, only organic, non gluten, non dairy blah blah, no lollies, TV, or playing games.  It is no wonder that mothers are falling apart all over the place.

I would take my two children to psychologists, dietitians, speech therapists, occupational therapists and more, just to try to understand what they are thinking and what I can do to make it better, here’s the kicker I should have just followed my instincts because I am also Autistic.  But these are professionals right?  Sure but they go by the book.

I am not saying they don’t help anyone they were all wonderful and helped me through some tough times, but later on as they grew older, I found that the stress of managing appointments pulling the kids out of kindy or school to travel over and hour or more to go to the appointments. I eventually gave up.

My kids now go to kindy and school, and I work five days a week, our house is a lot more calmer than ever because I am not stressed the kids don’t have added stress and I figured they are alive, they are growing, they are loved, they eat, they sing, they talk, they play they are healthy and happy. so what if they watch TV to help them calm before bed, or my son only eats bland boring foods and not colorful veggies.   I will never give up trying to challenge them to try new things but in the end everyone is healthy and happy why stress?.

This book is full of essays from real mothers that have let go of the good mother myth.  It opens your eyes to the fact that no one is perfect and the added pressure and stress on new mothers is terrible it is OK to let go, and be a good enough parent.

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3 thoughts on “The Good Mother Myth by Avital Norman Nathman – Review

  1. I love this post! I had the same challenge trying to breast feed Will. I tried for 3 months because the nurses told me to try harder, do better. I thought it was my fault, but he was underweight. I was a wreck. Turns out he was allergic. I had no instincts to follow because I got so twisted up, but after that, I calmed down and did my own thing. I tried juggling all those appointments with Will too. Sometimes less is more and too many people think they need to cure autism when Will’s autism is part of who he is. I recently had to tell his 6th grade teachers I wasn’t aiming for Will to be like everyone else. He’s neato the way he is. Just teach him. I think you’re pretty amazing, Jodie. I have to read this book.

  2. Pingback: October Wrap Up | Aussie Bookworm

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